Why Didn’t Anyone Reach Out to Me?

Okay, it’s tough love time. If you’ve been sick, discouraged, lonely, withdrawn, sad, or whatever…and you’re upset because neither the pastor nor one of the elders nor a deacon reached out to you…

Please read James 5. Okay?

I encourage you to read all of James. Read it regularly. But, for now, let’s focus on these verses…

“Is any among you afflicted? let him pray. Is any merry? let him sing psalms. Is any sick among you? let him call for the elders of the church; and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord.” (James 5:13-14, KJV)

Church hurt is real. And so is church neglect—sometimes. But if we’re going to be honest, we need to recognize that spiritual maturity includes not just receiving ministry but initiating it. That’s exactly what James is getting at in this short but powerful passage.

The word afflicted in James 5:13 can also be translated suffering or under hardship. James is speaking to those who are under pressure—emotionally, physically, financially, or spiritually. What’s the first instruction?

Pretty all-encompassing, right? Can anyone relate?

If we find ourselves going through difficulty or hardship, what’s the first thing we’re to do?

  • Complain? Nope
  • Get mad at God? Nope
  • Get mad at life? Nope
  • Get mad at the church for a lack of support or attention? Nope

The instruction is simple: Let him pray.

  • Not vent to our family and friends
  • Not post an angry rant on social media
  • Not sit and stew in silence
  • Not complain about…well…anyone or anything

PRAY

That is what we are to do!

In other words, go to God.

And this is where it would be wise to read what the Bible says about prayer — so you go to God in the proper way. You can read through the Psalms, meditate on the Lord’s Prayer, and study what the New Testament says about prayer.

Prayer isn’t the only thing we should do in hard times, but it should always be the first thing.

James also reminds us that, when we’re “merry,” we should express it. We should sing our praises!

What’s the best way to sing your praises to God? With your church family! That’s why we have corporate singing every Sunday! Are you there? Do you sing with us? Maybe you don’t attend the church I pastor, but do you sing with your church family?

It’s certainly not the only time you can praise God — but it’s a weekly opportunity to do so. And it’s something God wants us to do.

Then, James talks to those who are sick. He says they should call for the elders, and the elders can anoint with oil and so on and so forth. I’ve taught on this passage several times in my pastoral ministry, but I’m not going to talk about the prayer of healing or the oil in this devotional. Instead, I want to focus on the first part of what James says.

“Let him call for the elders.”

The initiative is on the person who is hurting.

Do you see that?

If not, read it again!

The expectation is NOT that the church leaders will reach out to the sick person. It’s on the sick person to reach out to the church leaders.

Do you see that?

Now, obviously, the person may be so sick that he or she can’t. In that case, the family can reach out on behalf of the person who is ill. The point is…

And let me say this as clearly as I can…

The local church isn’t a psychic hotline. We don’t know what we’re not told. And sometimes the reason someone doesn’t get a visit, a call, or a prayer isn’t because no one cares—it’s because no one knew.

Or… maybe it’s because we haven’t heard from the person in a while, and we’ve gotten caught up with other needs. We have to remember that there are other people out there — with struggles and needs as well. It’s not just us.

The point is that, if church leaders don’t reach out to you or come visit you when you’re sick or hurting, it’s not always a lack of love. It’s quite often a lack of communication.

And James is trying to protect the church from that breakdown by calling for personal initiative.

If you’re hurting—call.

If you’re sick—reach out.

If you need prayer—ask.

It’s not a sign of weakness. It’s biblical. It’s wise. And it’s the kind of spiritual maturity James is calling for.

God bless you!

Thank you for Reading!
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