The Bible is clear that God loves the world and that God’s followers are to love everyone. And yet, the Bible — and those who believe the Bible — hold views often deemed controversial and objectionable. As a result, Bible-believing Christians are often accused of being hateful, intolerant, and bigoted.
Is this fair? And how can Christians neutralize the allegation of hate while still standing for the truth?
Let’s first agree that people don’t always handle conflict or disagreement well, and this certainly includes those who identify as Christian. It is absolutely true that many Christians and churches have shown little grace and much contempt for those outside the faith and/or those who hold positions contrary to their understanding of the Bible. And Christians need to own that.
The Christian community needs to practice some good old-fashioned self-reflection and soul-searching when it comes to how we view and treat those with whom we disagree.
Countless men, women, and children have been hurt by professing Christians, churches, and faith-based institutions and organizations. This is true in both the past and the present. And if any of you reading this fall into the category of those who have been hurt by professing Christians, please allow me, as a Christian and as a pastor, to extend my sincerest regrets and best wishes to you.
Let me also say I believe everyone (Christians included) should be held accountable for their hurtful actions. And I believe hurtful words or beliefs should be appropriately challenged.
Therefore, it is fair to call out those Christians who have been mean-spirited, unkind, and cruel. Nevertheless… the following needs to be said…
In the words of atheist comedian Ricky Gervais: “Just because you’re offended, doesn’t mean you’re right.” I don’t agree with Gervais’s atheism, but I wholeheartedly agree with that statement.
Whether the issue is salvation, baptism, sexuality, gender, identity, tithing, or anything else, our society is full of people who were “upset” or “hurt” — or who even felt “abused” or “oppressed” — because the church they either visited or attended disagreed with (or disapproved of) their beliefs or practices.
Now, again, let me be the first to concede that not all churches handle disagreements properly. And, so, I’m not dismissing the fact that there are many people out there who have legitimately been hurt or even abused by Christians.
What I’m talking about is disagreement.
There is a difference between disagreement and disrespect. There is a difference between disagreement and hate. There is a difference between disagreement and abuse.
If you feel simple disagreement over values, beliefs, and/or practices causes you (or has caused you) harm, then you need to reevaluate your understanding of the word “harm.” And you probably should seek professional counseling or therapy to strengthen your mental health and emotional resilience.
To disagree is not to harm.
If you believe disagreement is the same as harm, abuse, or oppression, then on what basis do you make that claim? And who decides what disagreements are acceptable and which are not?
Does the government decide? Do corporations decide? Does the individual decide?
And if you say “the community decides,” what community? Your neighborhood? Your town? Your county? Or are you talking about a demographic group? And if so, which ones get to decide what disagreements are acceptable and which are not? And how do they decide? Majority vote? And how is that vote facilitated?
As you can see, this gets quite problematic — and frankly ludicrous.
The United States of America is a nation founded on the principles of freedom and the rule of law. And enshrined in the founding are the guarantees of free speech and the free exercise of religion. And I’m glad for that, and will continue to fight for that.
That means you need to accept that people will express opinions you find objectionable — and they will do so openly. And that is how it should be. And it’s how it must be, if we want to live in a free country.
The free exercise of religion means there will be many faith communities in this nation — some of whom will hold beliefs you find deplorable. And that is how it should be. And it’s how it must be, if we want to live in a free society.
You need to be okay with that.
People who are mentally healthy and emotionally strong are okay with that.
Now, please don’t misunderstand. I’m not in favor of oppression or religious authoritarianism.
No one should be legally obligated to attend or participate in a church or religious gathering against their wishes. And no organization (religious or otherwise) should mistreat, coerce, or abuse those who take part in their group.
Not only that, but the Bible commands Christians to be kind, respectful, and compassionate to everyone with whom they come in contact, including those who disagree with them. Don’t believe me? Here are just a few verses that speak to this:
- “[T]hou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself” (Leviticus 19:18b; Matthew 19:19b, 22:39b; Mark 12:31b; Luke 10:27b)
- “And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise” (Luke 6:31)
- “Honour all men” (I Peter 2:17a)
- “Love worketh no ill to his neighbour: therefore love is the fulfilling of the law” (Romans 13:10)
- “As we have therefore opportunity, let us do good unto all men” (Galatians 6:10a)
Again, I grant that not all Christians exemplify the above passages. Not all professing Christians practice the Golden Rule, the second Great Commandment, or the command to “honour all men.”
Nevertheless, no matter how many Christians fall short of the standard, the standard remains.
And the standard is clear because the Bible is clear.
Christians are to be kind, gracious, and loving to everyone – regardless of any differences.
Christians should love their neighbor. And, as Jesus makes clear in his parable of the Good Samaritan, your neighbor isn’t just the person who lives next door or in the same community. Your neighbor is whomever with whom you interact. It’s anyone in the path of your life.
We as God’s people are to love our neighbors, no matter our neighbors’ beliefs or practices.
This doesn’t mean we must agree with or affirm our neighbor’s words, beliefs, or actions. But we must love our neighbor. So, even though some people struggle with this concept, we can (and we should) love the person, even if we disagree with that person’s words, beliefs, or actions.
May Christians love everyone with whom they interact, and may all of us understand there is (and should be) a distinction between the person (who is made in the image of God) and that person’s beliefs, actions, or words (which don’t always align with God).
Love God. Love one another. And pursue the truth — or, I should say, the Truth (see John 14:6).
God bless you.
