I felt like a failure. I certainly didn’t have a handle on this thing called life. And yet I felt like I was treading water with no shore in sight. To mix metaphors, I felt like my body was clinging to a treadmill, my body twisted, unable to get my footing, and completely clueless about what to do.
That was me in the late 1980s. And, to be honest, I still feel like that sometimes. I’m sure many of us do. But I definitely felt lost in the late 1980s, and this feeling continued through my father’s death, the decline of my mother’s health, the first several years of my marriage, and my pre-ministry professional life.
It’s important to note that I believed in God, trusted in Christ, and was faithful in church. I didn’t read my Bible as consistently as I should (and that no doubt contributed to my state of mind), but…
It must be said that one of the reasons for my lack of consistent Bible reading and study as well as my feeling disconnected at times from church was…
What I heard from the pulpit wasn’t relevant (or at least didn’t feel relevant) to where I was at in life and what I was going through.
In my last article, I talked about the overall anxiety many Christians feel because of the seeming disconnect between the pulpit and pew (between pastors and those to whom they preach and teach). Please read that post (the first in this two-part series) when you can:
“How to Avoid (or at least Minimize) the Pulpit-Pew Disconnect (Part One)”
Before we go further, it’s important that you read these disclaimers and qualifiers (some of which I emphasized in my last article):
- It’s not always the pastor’s fault if/when someone doesn’t “connect” with that pastor.
- We should never compromise God’s word.
- I’m not endorsing shallow, superficial, or (certainly not) heretical teaching and preaching.
- Sometimes, the sheep won’t follow the shepherd — through no fault of the shepherd’s.
- Jesus was the most effective communicator ever to live, and not everyone followed Him.
Okay? Please read those disclaimers/clarifiers again as needed.
My point is simply that pastors (and Christian Bible teachers in general) need to make every reasonable effort to connect with those God puts before them and to effectively communicate God’s truths in a tangible, meaningful, and impactful manner.
And that means, yes, Christian preachers and teachers should strive to be (gasp!) relevant.
When I was in my late teens and early twenties, I often felt that what I heard from the pulpit was not relevant – it just didn’t connect with where I was in my life or what I was dealing with.
Now, this isn’t necessarily my pastor’s fault. I’m not trying to assign blame here — except in one sense. And that is…
There was a culture I grew up in – a fundamentalist (in my case, fundamentalist Baptist) culture that often emphasized truth, orthodoxy, and proper living to the exclusion of (or at least significant diminishing of) positive encouragement and practical help.
I see this same type of culture or mindset – in different variations, twists, and manifestations (of course) – with many churches, denominations, online communities, various evangelical sub-cultures, and many everyday Christians today.
It’s a mindset that often regards any positive encouragement or practical teaching as “watering down” God’s word and even borderline heretical.
I ran into this personally in my late teen years.
Let’s go back with me to the late 1980s – back when I started this post. Deeply insecure, I was struggling with major insecurities and what could be described as pathologically low self-esteem.
An older member of our church purchased and gave me two books as a gift:
- The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale
- Tough Times Never Last, but Tough People Do by Robert Schuller
The first book impacted me deeply. I hadn’t read that many books at this point in my life, but I devoured Peale’s book. I remember taking it with me to my grandparents’ place in West Virginia and reading it over Thanksgiving weekend. I was even moved to tears in parts.
I had never – I mean, NEVER – experienced this kind of Christianity. What I began to call “Positive Christianity.”
I had heard a lot about hell, God’s judgment, God’s anger, and how I needed to keep myself pure and not get corrupted by “the world.” I heard about that over and over again. Growing up in an Independent Fundamentalist Baptist (IFB) culture, I had heard all about how we shouldn’t go to the beach or do any mixed bathing, how women should wear dresses and not pants, how music with drums was of the Devil (unless it was Bluegrass or Southern Gospel – there was apparently a divine exception for any “beats” in those music genres), how we shouldn’t go to the movies (or really even watch TV), and how the King James Bible was the only legitimate version of God’s word.
This isn’t to say that it was all bad. It wasn’t. I know, with all my heart, that the pastors and almost all of the teachers in the churches I grew up in as well as the Christian school I attended were sincere, dedicated servants of God. They loved the Lord and they loved us.
There were very few exceptions to the above statement.
But… with the exception of some chapel services or Bible classes at the Christian school I attended and the Young Marrieds’ Sunday school class my wife and I later joined… I rarely heard much that was positive, encouraging, motivational, practical, or relevant.
The reality is that Norman Vincent Peale and Robert Schuller positively impacted my life in the areas in which I was struggling more so than the preaching I most often heard from the pulpit in my own home church.
That’s a fact.
And all the Christian critics of Peale, Schuller, and the critics of the next generation of Peales and Schullers today, can bemoan that, criticize me for it, and even condemn me for it. But it doesn’t change the facts!
The two books that my friend got me began to change my life, and over the next several years, I read more self-help books (some faith-based, some secular) and attended several motivational talks.
I want to be clear that I don’t always agree with Peale or Schuller or the others like them (such as Joel Osteen). Indeed, as I’ve matured in the Lord since the late 1980s, I rarely turn to the practical, positive, what might be called “self-help Christianity.” Although…
I still find practical books and talks helpful from time to time.
Today, I would much, much rather hear a sermon from Tim Keller, Tony Evans, or John MacArthur than Joel Osteen. But…
Because of what I went through years ago, I am nowhere near as quick (as some of my Christian friends and ministry colleagues are) to criticize “self-help” or “positive Christianity.”
Quite often, people come to our churches needing practical, tangible, relevant guidance and wisdom from the word of God on marriage, sex, parenting, relationships in general, interpersonal communication, stress, career, time management, money management, self-esteem, and more. And quite often, in many churches…
They leave hungry. Indeed, in many cases, they are starving. 🙁
And too many Christians just don’t care.
To be clear…
- The primary mission of the local church is the Great Commission.
- People need to be told that God loves them, but they also need to know they are sinners in need of a Savior.
- “Self-help” can easily (and often does) contribute to selfishness and pride, which is anathema to God.
- Pastors (and preachers in general) are called to “preach the word,” not be armchair psychologists, comedians, entertainers, or motivational speakers.
- The church must be about the primary business of making disciples for Jesus Christ. Nothing the church does should detract from this business.
- It’s not possible for a pastor to meet all the needs of all the people attending the church he pastors.
- It’s certainly not possible for a single sermon to address all the needs in a person’s life.
I want to be explicit on all of the above.
There is no “but” to the above statements. I simply want to add the following:
It’s not wrong to want to reach non-Christians or even struggling Christians who are hurting and who need some encouragement, practical guidance, and motivation in their lives.
It’s not wrong to want to give sheep a helping hand based on the ground the sheep are currently walking on — or struggling over.
Not only is it “not wrong,” I believe it is RIGHT and PROPER to do so!
We can teach and preach the truths of God’s word and carry out the Great Commission while also helping those in need (whether those needs are emotional, relational, or practical).
And we should. As it says in the Book of Proverbs…
“Withhold not good from them to whom it is due, when it is in the power of thine hand to do it. Say not unto thy neighbour, Go, and come again, and to morrow I will give; when thou hast it by thee.”
Proverbs 3:27-28, KJV
This applies not only to assistance with food, shelter, or finances. It applies to helping people with love, encouragement, guidance, and wisdom as well. In fact, quite often, people need the latter more than the former.
And it’s not wrong for people to look for those things – love, encouragement, guidance, and wisdom – in church. May churches and pastors everywhere have the desire and passion not to “withhold” those things from them.
God bless you.
*****
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