Sacred Sexuality: 10 Bible Passages That Teach Sexual Morality

The Chesapeake Bay Bridge is one of the defining landmarks of the mid-Atlantic coastal region. I’ve traveled across it numerous times. One time, there was some kind of road work and traffic stopped on the bridge. I didn’t like that at all.

Have you ever wondered how many drivers might accidentally drive off the bridge if there weren’t guardrails? I imagine a lot.

Not me. I wouldn’t even think of driving (or riding) across that bridge if there weren’t any guardrails!

And yet…

When it comes to sex, people practice it frequently without any real regard for God’s guardrails.

Few pastors want to write about sex and intimacy. The entire subject, in all its variations and complexities, is sensitive and controversial. For some, it’s extremely painful. Yet I think the fact that many pastors (and churches) are reluctant to talk about sex has contributed to the confusion and total mess we find ourselves in today.

Please don’t see pastors like me as prudes or killjoys. Yes, I’m sure some are. That’s not my heart. I don’t have any personal desire to intrude into your life or tell you how to live. I don’t. Okay? But…

As a pastor, I’ve had to walk through the rubble of people’s lives. Oftentimes, those people are victims of the sins of others. But not always. Sometimes, people take a wrecking ball to their own lives because they disregard God’s clear boundaries and guardrails.

When it comes to sex and relationships, people wreck their lives all the time.

This doesn’t mean that God can’t repair the damage. He can. But why damage your life in the first place? Why mess up your life with self-inflicted wounds? Why not just do things God’s way?

If you want to live a life that’s honoring to God and rewarding to your heart, it is wise to know God’s rules. And to follow them.

So, what does God say about the subject of sex?

To answer that question, we must look to God’s revelation, and that takes us to the Scriptures. What does the Bible have to say on the subject?

It turns out… a lot. Let’s first look at just seven (7) passages that speak of boundaries for sexuality. I encourage you to look up all these passages, study them, and meditate on them. And then apply these principles to your life.

• “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.” (Matthew 5:27-28, KJV)

• “Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. Or know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God’s.” (I Corinthians 6:18-20, KJV)

• “But fornication, and all uncleanness, or covetousness, let it not be once named among you, as becometh saints.” (Ephesians 5:3, KJV)

• “Mortify therefore your members which are upon the earth; fornication, uncleanness, inordinate affection, evil concupiscence, and covetousness, which is idolatry.” (Colossians 3:5, KJV)

• “For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication: That every one of you should know how to possess his vessel in sanctification and honour; Not in the lust of concupiscence, even as the Gentiles which know not God.” (I Thessalonians 4:3-5, KJV)

• “Flee also youthful lusts: but follow righteousness, faith, charity, peace, with them that call on the Lord out of a pure heart.” (II Timothy 2:22, KJV)

• “Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.” (Hebrews 13:4, KJV)

Personal commentary on the above passages is unnecessary, but let’s make sure we understand the key terms. These verses clearly tell God’s people to steer clear of adultery (even in our hearts) and fornication.

Adultery is (or at least should be) self-explanatory. The term fornication comes from the Greek word “πορνεία” (porneia). It’s the same word we get pornography from. It is used broadly in the New Testament to refer to various forms of sexual immorality. It encompasses adultery, prostitution, unchastity, and other forms of illicit sexual relations outside the bonds of marriage.

In Hebrews 13:4, the writer warns that God will judge “whoremongers” and adulterers. What’s a “whoremonger”? The Greek word is “πόρνος” (pornos), which is related to “πορνεία” (porneia). Once again, it is a broader term for sexual immorality, though there may be a contextual emphasis on prostitution (both prostitutes and their clientele).

Again, I’m not trying to engage in what is probably obvious commentary. I just want to make sure that the key terms are understood.

To end on a positive note…

God is not anti-sex.

If He were, then we wouldn’t have sexual interests or capabilities. And there wouldn’t be these Bible passages:

• “Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe; let her breasts satisfy thee at all times; and be thou ravished always with her love.” (Proverbs 5:18-19, KJV)

• “Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.” (I Corinthians 7:3-5, KJV)

Blushing yet?

Well, if you’re not, read the Song of Solomon (aka Song of Songs). Over the years, some theologians have argued that the Song of Solomon was simply allegorical — illustrating God’s love for Israel and/or the church. I agree that many books can be interpreted on multiple levels, but the primary focus of Song of Solomon is romantic love.

And any theologian or pastor who dismisses the Song of Solomon as merely an allegorical reference to Israel or the church is doing a major disservice to the church.

The Song of Solomon speaks of romantic intimacy between a husband and wife in poetic language. When you study that language, the meaning starts to become clear. Let’s just say anyone who thinks the Bible is boring hasn’t read (or at least understood) the Song of Solomon!

But the Song of Solomon isn’t really our tenth (10th) passage for this article. Consider it a bonus 11th passage. 🙂

The tenth passage is what takes us back to the very beginning of marriage itself!

And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed. (Genesis 2:21-25, KJV)

You do understand, I hope, that “cleave” was not referring to Adam and Eve signing a printed marriage certificate. The Hebrew word for “cleave” is “דָּבַק” (dabaq) refers to a deep, enduring commitment that a husband is to have for his wife. It speaks to a unique bond that a husband and wife share that is unique from all other relationships. And, while it extends beyond sexual intimacy, it most certainly includes sexual intimacy.

Face it. The whole sex thing? It was God’s idea!

Therefore, God is not against you having sexual enjoyment or being physically and emotionally connected to the one you love. God simply wants you to channel your sexuality into marriage.

God is pro-marriage. And, in the context of marriage, God is pro-sex.

Note Hebrews 13:4 again. The writer of Hebrews tells us that the “marriage bed” is “undefiled.” That means sexual intimacy between a husband and wife is pure in God’s eyes.

Sex within marriage is sacred.

So, what does all this mean? Well…

• If you are married, enjoy sexual intimacy with your husband or wife. And stay faithful to your spouse.
• If you’re married, and you and your spouse are experiencing anxieties or struggles related to sexuality, this is a matter that needs prayer and godly counsel. And possibly medical counsel as well.
• If you are in a relationship but not married, wait for sex until you are.
• If you are in a romantic relationship and have no intention of marrying that person, why are you in a romantic relationship with that person?
• If you’re not married and you’ve already fallen into sexual temptation, then repent and purpose in your heart to honor God with your body from this point forward.

This article isn’t written to shame anyone for past sins or missteps. We’re all human. I get it. And our God is very much in the forgiveness business. But receiving God’s forgiveness starts with humility, honesty, and repentance.

If you want God to bless your relationships, do things His way.

Just as you wouldn’t (if you were sane anyway) cross the Chesapeake Bay Bridge without guardrails, why would you engage in intimate relationships without regard for God’s wisdom and guidelines?

God’s way is always the best way.

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For more on this topic, check out:

• “Was Sex the Forbidden Fruit in the Garden of Eden?”
• “What Does the Bible Say About Identity, Sex, Marriage, and Family?”