It’s Pastor Appreciation Month, and I’d like to pull the curtain back, if I may, on what life is like for us pastors. I do this not to complain, but to remind all of us why pastors need your prayers, your support, and, yes, some slack. I know I’ve blogged on this topic before, but it’s something that churches need help with – continually.
Necessary disclaimer: I’m not targeting anyone, nor am I suggesting anything negative about the church I currently serve – or the one I served previously. On the contrary, I’m blessed. Still, all churches need this reminder from time to time.
Pastors of small to mid-sized churches—those serving congregations of up to 200 people—often carry an incredible breadth of responsibility. Unlike pastors in larger churches who may have multiple staff members or department heads to share the load, pastors of churches under 200 frequently wear many hats. We continually shift mental gears and have to tap into a vast array of skill sets.
Pastors are responsible for sermon and lesson preparation, casting a vision, praying for the members of the church, hospital visits, funerals, weddings, discipleship, managing volunteers, and often some (in some cases, most or all) of the nuts and bolts of church operations.
There are many weeks where I’m pulled in multiple directions – sermon prep, families in crisis, hospital visits, business and/or committee meetings, pastoral care/counseling situations, etc.
The emotional energy required of shepherding a congregation—celebrating life’s joys while walking with people through grief, conflict, and spiritual struggles—can be heavy. Add to that the constant pressure of limited time, high expectations, misunderstandings, people getting their feelings hurt over often small things, and the need to care for their own families …. and it’s easy to see how a pastor’s week can be packed and their heart overwhelmed.
The last item (caring for our own families) could justify a blog post all its own. Pastors, as an occupation group, have high divorce rates. And I know of many, many pastors whose children have grown up to resent the church. Many pastors’ kids no longer attend church when they become adults. Pastor families need support from the churches of which they are a part, and they need churches to understand (really understand) that the pastors need to spend time with their families.
None of this is a complaint. It’s perspective. Being a pastor is a joy and a calling — but it is also heavy.
Yes, we all – pastors included – must trust in the Lord. We must “count it all joy” when we hit trials and tribulations. God is good. He is always on the Throne. Nothing I say here changes any of that. It’s just that we shouldn’t use the promises of God (regarding anxiety, difficulties, etc.) to lead us to think that it’s okay to unnecessarily or unfairly overburden pastors — or take them for granted.
What the Bible Says About Esteeming Your Pastor
The Apostle Paul wrote in 1 Thessalonians 5:12-13:
“And we beseech you, brethren, to know them which labour among you, and are over you in the Lord, and admonish you; And to esteem them very highly in love for their work’s sake. And be at peace among yourselves.”
And Hebrews 13:17 reminds us:
“Obey them that have the rule over you, and submit yourselves: for they watch for your souls, as they that must give account, that they may do it with joy, and not with grief: for that is unprofitable for you.”
Paul calls believers to esteem their pastors in love because of their labor. They work for your spiritual well-being. They counsel, pray, teach, and lead—not as a job, but as a calling. Hebrews reminds us to cooperate with their leadership and not to make their work harder than it already is.
How Can You Encourage Your Pastor?
Paul’s words in 1 Thessalonians 5:12-13 and Hebrews 13:17 remind us to appreciate, honor, and support pastors rather than add to their burdens.
Here are a few simple ways to bless your pastor:
- Pray for him. More than anything, pastors need prayer. Pray for wisdom, endurance, and strength.
- Respect his time. Pastors want to help, but they can’t be everywhere at once. Be mindful of their workload.
- Be kind in criticism. If you have an issue, bring it with grace and humility rather than complaints or gossip. And make any criticism constructive, not destructive. Be helpful.
- Be at peace. (See I Thessalonians 5:13b). Simple. Just be at peace in the church and with those in the church. Be at peace.
- Look for ways to lighten the load. Volunteer. Offer to help.
- Encourage him. A kind word—“Pastor, that sermon really helped me”—can mean more than you know.
- Remember his family. Pastors’ wives and children often sacrifice a lot for the church. Be considerate of their needs, too. And encourage them!
- Help cultivate a positive and healthy church culture (and structure) – one that enables the church to function more effectively and doesn’t add to the pastor’s grief.
- Let the pastor have rest and a life outside church responsibilities. I have so much to say on this one, but it will require a separate blog post. For now, let me simply say… Your pastor needs a life. Let him rest. Let him have hobbies. Don’t make him work 70-plus-hour weeks or more. And don’t begrudge him taking time for rest, his family, and himself.
Final Thought: Make Ministry a Joy, Not a Grief
Hebrews 13:17 warns against causing pastors unnecessary grief, saying that it is “unprofitable for you.” Why? Because a discouraged pastor leads a discouraged church. A joyful pastor—one who feels supported, loved, and appreciated—will serve with more passion, energy, and focus.
Your pastor isn’t perfect. No one is. But (assuming he meets the pastoral qualifications in I Timothy and Titus), he is likely trying—often sacrificing far more than you know. A little patience, kindness, and support go a long way in making his ministry one of joy rather than grief.
And that benefits everyone.
For more on this topic…
👉 “A Pastor’s Heart”
👉 “I’m Sorry, But I’m Not Always Available”
👉 “8 Things I Wish For as a Pastor From Those I Serve”
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